Fanny's Film Fucks: April 2010

Hello pervs and welcome to my new monthly post about recent my cinematic viewing pleasures and observations on what has made it through the realm of the censors.

This month Fanny checked out:

I AM LOVE

Operatic is the word everyone is using to describe this film and it truly is: incredibly powerful music, stunningly shot in a way so few films attempt anymore, and wildly dramtic storyline of rich bitches in Milan. I always love how Tilda Swinton sexualises her androgyny and here she is middle aged beauty finally letting her hair down with her sons friend. The sex scenes are beautiful, her son is HOT and the bitchy polished grandma is hillarious. Don't see this film on an empty stomach though, it's an incredibly sensual film, including it's use of food.


WHIP IT

This list basically goes like this: hot tattooed girls, some in tight spandex outfits, beating each other up, on rollerskates, Ellen Page, Drew Barrymore, Eve, and Ari Graynor. There was basically no way I was ever NOT going to like this film. It's fun and flippant andf totally watchable. The underwater sex scene is a little weird - the actors look totally awarkward - but at least it's with a skinny indie boy so it's worth watching. But hello Wilson brother, Andrew, I haven't checked out before! Your family is seriously a bunch a stone foxes.

SAMSON & DELILAH

Ok, so this film is very hard for some people to watch and not one that will have you rushing back for a second viewing. But as an ex-pat I have to say that this is an incredibly important film, one that Australia needed to make and it was done brilliantly. Now that my serious rant is over, I have one main thing to say: Samson (Rowan McNamara) dancing with his top off. You see a bit of it in the trailer but sweet jesus it is a beautiful scene. It's cut with this incredible look of growing desire in Delilah's eyes, which actually struck me as something I don't see that much of in films (ie. a woman observing man and seeing the effect it has upon her).

STREET DANCE 3D (UK release: Friday 21 May 2010)

Predictable Friday night popcorn film it certainly is. If you've seen any other dance films in the last 10 years, it feels totally derivitive of them all. But hey, it does it well, and it's very British in a cheesy Hollywood way, so it does what it sets out to do. From the opening scene I thought I was about to see some 3D bedroom action (only a matter of time till someone does it) but sadly no. In fact, the whole film is very hands off and there aren't many hotties but they did very well at making Charlotte Rampling look like she's still go it going on! (I LOVE Charlotte Rampling)

DATE NIGHT

This film left Robin with a bit of a Tina Fey crush, which I don't mind at all because at least that takes the pressure off me having to look like Demi Moore in Charlie's Angels 2 when I pass 40. Anyway, the film is fun, fast moving and quite a sweet look at a modern married couple trying to keep their relationship fun, and the trouble it gets them into. It's really cast-up on the supporting roles, with Mark Wahlberg running around topless and the dishy James Franco playing it tough. No sex but hey, Tina and Steve kinda look like brother and sister anyway.

THE DISSAPEARANCE OF ALICE CREED (UK release: Friday 30 April 2010)

We all know Gemma Arterton is hot and she is going to be HUGE once Prince of Persia comes out next month, so it's nice to see her in this very small very British film just before she skyrockets away. This thriller is very tightly executed by hot new writer/director J Blakeson, so well indeed you barley notice that it doesn't move beyond one room and three characters for most of the film. Apart from totally scoring with Gemma, it is also wins with the addition of the very pretty Martin Compston (Red Road) who is very convincing as the charming and seductive kidnapper, who... oh god I want to spoil it for you but I won't. Definitely see this.

KICK-ASS

Written by our idea of a yummy-mummy, Jane Goldman, and starring this years ultimate MILF-lover, Aaron Johnson, Kick-Ass is pretty awesome, but the entire film is stolen by Hit Girl (Chloë Moretz), the best pre-pubescent female character since Mathilda in Léon. I actually really liked how unapologetic they made her and how she was dressed not in some overtly sexualised super-hero costume, but in exactly what I would have worn if I were a 12 year-old vigilante. Can the sequel just be about her, because the rest of the storyline paled in comparison. Apart from the sex-scene out the back of the comic book store, where Johnson and his girlfriend (Lyndsy Fonseca) have a spend a good minute of screen time fucking in the sunshine. Apparently there was another sex scene that hit the cutting room floor but might be worth buying the extended cut DVD for.


What Fanny is looking forward to:

SEX AND THE CITY 2 (UK release: Friday 28 May 2010)

No need to explain why but check out the red dress with the spikey shoulders that Samantha is rocking. Oh my, how Fanny needs this in her world!

IRON MAN 2 (UK release: Friday 30 April 2010)

Robert Downey Jnr plus Scarlett Johansson in a leather catsuit, yes please!

COCO CHANEL AND IGOR STRAVINSKY (UK release: TBC)

I was so excited when it was annouced yesterday that Soda Pictures had acquired this film for release in the UK. But hey, I am always a sucker for a bio pic about famous people hooking up. Looks like we should expect lots of style and sex. Hurrah!

SALT (UK release: Friday 20 August 2010)

Angelina Jolie does Bourne. With black hair. I'm not going to kid myself by pretending that I won't watch this.


Which films Fanny would like to see get an international release:

THE RUNAWAYS

Can someone PLEASE pick up the rights to this for UK release! I am in no way a Twilight fan but you've automatically got your market right there.

HAPPINESS RUNS

Cheesy thriller about the implications of growing up with free love. Based on a true story? Ok!

8: THE MORMON PROPOSITION

Interesting documentary about the role that right-wing religious types have in fucking up equal rights.