"Think that book clubs are all about Healthcliffe, Darcy and Mr Rochester? Here's a naughtly little soirée to prove you otherwise. At this alternative book club, there's a new saucy fiction each month (this month it's 'Emmanuelle', so get flicking quickly) to get your teeth into alongside a young, hip east London audience (and not a crusty old lech in sight!). What's more, it's free and you're encouraged to bring a bottle too."
After Pandora is as a friendly members community based in London, which regularly holds socials and parties which focus upon creating a safe, accepting environment for self-expression, creativity and heaps of naughty fun. In order to join this community, potential members are invited to attend one of their regular social events which are held in order to vet potential members for their private events.
What a great venue! This summer soiree was held on the Battersea Barge which is tucked in on the Thames just near the Battersea Power Station, which made it the ideal setting for such an night. Even though it was a typically breezy London in June evening, it was still a marvellous spot and the intimate, cabaret style interior made it ideal for such a party.
As usual, I hadn't read much about what I was going to (I saw the word 'pervy' and 'party' and that was about all I needed) so I just figured this was an event for all the regular members to attend without necessarily any below the belt action happening. You know, a civil affair rather than a sordid one. I hadn't read up that this was an event to vet me as a potential member, so I left Robin tied up at home and bought some lovely lady arm candy with me instead. It was my bad in doing so and probably tainted my initial impression when I climbed aboard the boat only to discover that, even at nearly 9pm, the party was in less than full swing. I am quite sure there is a restriction by the venue owners on the numbers that can attend, and of course the organisers want to ensure that everyone can get a seat during the performances plus they can meet and great all the newbies, so keep the crowd to a minimum was preferable, but it didn't make for a very wow! event. That said, practically everyone in attendance had come dressed in costume and were eager to engage with the proceedings of the evening.
My friend and I were lucky to grab a seat up the front near the ample stage area and I was really pleased that there was a sit down, traditional cabaret style section for the audience. One of my biggest gripes with so many nights with such performances is that you have to stand up, and as a both a former entertainer and a lady of small stature in heels, I am never impressed by such an option. So it was great to be able to plonk ourselves within close proximity to the action. And, my word, was there action! As this was a free event (no cover charge AND reasonable food and drink prices I might add) I am a little more forgiving of the performances which kept swinging from simply outstanding to rather dubious. Of notable mention was the oh-so-watchable and incredibly talented Bryony Kimmings, who kind of stole my friend and my heart that evening. I really encourage anyone who gets the chance to catch one of her performances to rush rush rush to be there. Also a shining star was The Groom, who literally bought the house lights down with his fucking hot Kill Bill burlesque. Original, energetic and so terrifyingly hot, there was a dry pair of pants left in the room. The compere for the evening Jessica Fostekew was also such a pleasure you often would have preferred she stay on stage a bit longer. Female stand-up comedians are such rarities; it makes this one a bit of a treasure. I don't think I could write this review without mentioning the final performance by Katja Saucy-Pants. As a lover of Gurlesque, I am very accustomed to seeing great lengths of tinsel, flags etc being pulled from a woman's nether regions, but perhaps after her rendition of 'Diamonds Are A Girls Best Friend" I wasn't really expecting that she had been carrying that much plastic jewellery inside herself all that time.... though it was delightful to see a splodge of joy juice go flying into some guys face at the end.
After the performances, we adjourned back up on deck where I had the delight of finally meeting Miss Kitty Stryker before my friend and decided it was probably worth making the long journey (well long for someone who rarely leaves it) back to East London before we got too drunk.
I'd be very interested in seeing what the actual parties are like. And who knows, I might even let Robin out to play too.
Last month Fanny checked out: Nothing! Warm weather, World Cup and a lack of interesting releases....
What Fanny is looking forward to: GAY SEX IN THE 70's (Showing at the ICA: 1 - 4, 8 July 2010)
I wish I was looking forward to gay sex in the 70's! This documentary is showing as part of the ICA's Pout 2 season of new queer cinema.
HEARTBREAKER (UK release date: Friday 2nd July 2010)
I love trailers for foreign films where they manage to not say a word so people might not realise hey, this isn't in english! Anyway, Romain Duris (from THE BEAT THAT MY HEART SKIPPED) is totally cute and opposite Vanessa 'practically Mrs Johnny Depp' Paradis, this looks like a possible cheesy rom com that sitauted outside of Hollywood. Could be a win. Did I mention my dad keeps going to see rom com's? Brilliantly, he thought J Lo's new one THE BACK UP PLAN was really good. Enough said.
GAINSBOURG (UK release date: Friday 30 July 2010)
Boy, does Éric Elmosnino look like him or what!
HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS (UK release date: Part 1 - Friday 19 November 2010)
Yeah yeah, wotevs. I'm excited.
TRON: LEGACY (Worldwide release date: Friday 17 December 2010)
Man, are Disney pushing for this to be the big Xmas hit or what! It looks dam cyber sexy though....
Which films Fanny would like to see get an international release: THE EXTRA MAN
Does Kevin Kline's voice sound remarkably like Rob Jeremy's in ANCHOR MAN? This could be funny...
MIDDLE MEN
Crazy yet believable bio pic about the guys that worked out how to build the internet's erotic captial, making it into the fine palace of porn and pounds it is today.
Yeah, yeah, yeah > action, arrogance, leather catsuits, all these buttons are hit. If you want it, the film has got it. Most interestingly for me though was the fact that simply by giving Mickey Rourke a Russian accent made him out-sex both Robert Downey Jnr and Sam Rockwell. Not sure what that was about, but it was working for me. Then again, every time he put on his reading glasses, he did look more like a well styled older lesbian, so maybe the clue is there. Storyline wise, it was incredibly patchy and very self-indulgent, feeling more like Jon Favreau (could you have put yourself in anymore scenes?) had $200M to spend hanging out with his friends. Even Scarlett Johansson filing out the catsuit with her one-dimensional character barely saves it. But hey, Robin was grinning ear to ear the whole way through, so who am I to judge?
ROBIN HOOD
I really wanted to hate this film, so the fact that I thought it was ok means most people will like it. It mainly has to do with my serious adversion (to put it nicely) to Russell Crowe. It felt like such a stretch to imagine him as a decent guy, let alone a hot hero. Basically the guy makes me vomit a little into my mouth at the mere thought of him. That aside, you get the feeling the majority of this film was left on the cutting room floor as they tried to squish the storyline together. Cate Blanchett was wasted once again playing... Cate Blanchett. The way Matthew Macfadyen was barely onscreen smacked of the fact that hey, there could be sequel, so we need to set the Sheriff of Nottingham up as the next big baddie. But my word, did they try and sex this storyline up. Surley the scene where we are introduced to Prince John in bed is totally unncessary except for the fact that we get to see Oscar Isaac in all his naked glory. And of course casting a hot guy from Guatemala as the next in line to the English throne only made sense because of that scene, right? Right? Who cares, I now have a new South American actor to fancy. Yay!
SEX AND THE CITY 2
It is of course terrible. Truely marvellously terrible. And I loved loved loved every minute of it. But you know, after all this time I've invested in these characters, how was I not going to? Samantha wins all my wardrobe awards, Charlotte and her comedy faces and hats are getting scarily close to trannie territory, what the fuck is going on with Carrie's hair in nearly every shot and thank god they made Miranda fun again. The opening wedding sequence is painful and doesn't fit the rest of the film (let alone who would believe that Stanford and Anthony *really* get married) and the second act definitely feels like it was written by the Abu Dhabi tourism board, but it does really come together in the end when Samantha, as the emodiment of everything the Middle East hates about Western women, comes into her own as a one woman sex crusaider. And there are of course the now requiste naked ass shots of all the hot guys she fucks sequeezed in for good measure. And if you can get through the kareoke scene and still love them, then count yourself as a true fan.
What Fanny is looking forward to:
CERTIFIED COPY (UK release: Friday 3 September 2010)
The darling of Cannes; the comparisions to Before Sunrise/Sunset are naturally making me enthusiastic.
Which films Fanny would like to see get an international release:
LOVE RANCH
Just watch the trailer. Seriously. Helen Mirren AND Gina Gershon! It has 'Fanny wants' written all over it, so if you are listening E1 Entertainment, send it over here please.
ÇA COMMENCE PAR LA FIN
Too Risque For Cannes? Steamy erotic film with Emmanuelle Béart and her husband Michaël Cohen? YES PLEASE!
ALLELUIA
It hasn't even gone into production yet but I am already salivating with anticipation at the announcement of Fabrice du Welz casting Beatrice Dalle (aka Betty Blue)in his bio pic of 1940s serial killers Martha beck and Raymond Fernandez!
The second party for London's newest and most exciting performance and play party, Kinky Salon London, was held last night with the theme of Science Friction. The UK extension of a party that has been running in San Francisco for nine years, Kinky Salon promotes itself as a sex-positive environment for people of all genders and sexual identities, and this not-for-profit event was held in a secret decorated East London warehouse. Run by a community of volunteers, entry prices range from £10 for contributors to £30 for high earners / last minute tickets, with the majority of tickets on sale for £20.
I was quite excited about attending this party as the shorthand description generally used to describe it is Shortbus, which is exactly the kind of creative, queer community building environment I had been looking for in London, having found such spaces (albeit nearly a decade ago) in Sydney's (once thriving?) alterna-queer scene.
Upon arriving, I was instantly warmed by both the feeling of overt friendless and organisation, and pleased with the obvious level of effort and humour which had gone into everyone's costumes. As a woman who has bounced around in such play scenes, clubs and parties over many years, I was also impressed and reassured by the code of conduct and PAL system simply because the lack of such things in other spaces are usually my biggest gripes when the fact that I am a big sExhibitionist leads some less discerning men (and occasionally women) to think is an open invitation to touch and harass me. Thus, once inside, I instantly felt at ease / at home.
We'd been less excited about the location of the secret venue when it was revealed but this was simply because we go to a lot of events here and were hoping for something new. It also isn't the safest space to access, its only entrance down a dark East London back street near many council estates, which is even more of an issue when attendees are encouraged to arrive in costume as there is little-to-no changing space. Not surprisingly, we were hassled by a bunch of ASBO youth who seemed to be deliberately loitering nearby, who took a little too much interest in not only Robin's wig and heels but the fact that we were obviously a couple. But, to be fair, we cop this a lot when we go out, so it is definitely nothing to be held against the venue or KSL organisers.
Knowing the venue as we do, I could definitely appreciate how much effort had gone into transforming the space, marking different areas for certain activities, and dressing it for the occasion. Despite my initial reservation, I was quickly convinced that the team had made this into a unique night and it was destined to be a lot of fun. I have no doubt that KSL is run by a savvy and ambitious bunch who know how to pick and shape space and probably have their sites set on growing the event to a bigger venue in good time.
I also liked the fact that entry was strictly between 9 and 10pm, as I am always a sucker for rocking up late in order to catch a party in full swing. You knew by the limited opening time that the party would start as soon as you arrived and the space quickly filled with creatively attired revellers. HOT creatively attired revellers, mind you! There was, in mind, definitely a bevy of well-styled, cute partygoers of all shapes and sizes to make this event worth ones while!
Once the door bitch was off duty and everyone had a few drinks in them, the cabaret finally started. We were instantly enraptured by the lovely Suzanne Portnoy's erotic reading and couldn't help feeling each other up during her warmly sardonic description of fantasy fulfilment gone not quite right. Diva Burlesque and Tricity Vogue were equally a treat and Vix left a good smell of fried synthetic hair in the air. And as the evenings compere, Luke Meredith came pretty close to the standard set by Justin Bond in my high expectations.
Perhaps a little too quickly the entertainment was over but thankfully there was some great party tunes to shake your ass too. While some of the party moved on to the play space at the this point, it was quite nice to see people still bouncing around having fun and socialising. As an East London regular, I probably shouldn't have been quite so surprised by how many people I knew at the party, and it was really lovely when it came to hanging out, having fun and feeling part of a community. But as someone who loves a little anonymity when she *really* enjoys herself in public, it did become a bit of an issue for me when I moved into play space... But then, maybe this lady should just fuck off to San Francisco is she doesn't want to bump into anyone she knows when she is having a grind.
As someone with experience of open horizons, I wasn't used to coming into such a space in a monogamous relationship, so it was a new experience for me. It would have been fun to have somewhere to relax with a drink while watching the beautiful bodies mingle together but to be fair the space limited any couple trying to do so to look like they were queueing for a spot in the throng, so it was very much a get involved or go downstairs environment. But everyone was having so much fun, you couldn't help but want to be part of it.
All in all, I had a very fun evening and have a lot of respect for the aims and efforts of the KSL team. As Robin said to me as we stumbled home, I think we might be very close to finding out perfect party. Hurrah!
I must admit, as much as a perv as I am, I was a little apprehensive at first about going along to Kinky Salon. Not because of any prudishness, but I think I was a little concerned that an English version of Shortbus would rather more resemble a swingers party full of my parents friends rather than anything I would fancy diving into, things always look a bit more glamorous in the movies. As it was it seems 99% of my fears were completely unjustified. Fanny and I for some time have been looking for a club where we really feel we fit in. Torture Garden can often far more resemble a catwalk show than somewhere you feel you can let go, others are incredibly heteronormative, or we're comfortable but surrounded by gay friends with no one to share experiences with. Technically Fanny and I are a heterosexual monogamous couple, but with a cross dressing anarchist tank driver and a strap-on weilding swaggering showgirl, we don't really fit societies roles too well. One of the things I really liked about KSL was the fact that everyone felt welcome and included, there was a great mix of straight and queer kids of all persuasions and perversions, and you really felt safe being yourself amongst it all.
I must admit, at first I thought their whole sets of rules, PAL systems etc was a bit of an over kill, however on reflection, I guess this made a whole load of discussion and boundary setting unnecessary on the night. The only discussion needed was to discuss our boundaries as a couple, which was an interesting and positive relationship building experience.
The night was well structured and, as a party promoter myself, one of the things I really liked was their strict door entrance window from 9-10pm. It meant that as soon as you turned up, you knew that the party would be going, rather than having to wait for the post pub/club crowds to turn up. The only problem was that, as people left there was no-one coming along to replace them, and of course it meant I had to get my fucking false eyelashes to stay in place several hours quicker than normal. The evening started with music, then cabaret and then the dance floor got going (Fanny's flooding of their playlist with booty tracks certainly helped with this part). Once the show was over then the upstairs play area opened up, and the party really started. Peeking in, the mass of hot bodies writhing on the giant bed was a beautiful sight to behold. Alas dear readers rule number 6 "what happens at KS stays at KS" prevents me from telling you about all of the wonderful experiences I had and sights that I saw (you'll just have to attend yourself one day). Slipping in and out of the play area, made me realise however that perhaps the cabaret, or at least DJ's could have had more focus post "game on" announcement. It did feel a bit like the whole focus of the party suddenly shifted, with the door people, DJ's and everyone else running off to have fun rather than keeping the dance floor rocking too. If you need a playtime DJ, then Fistly (our collective DJ name) is available for booking ;-)
As for the clientel, Oh My God, I was not disappointed. More creativity and desire than you can shake a stick at. The crowd is mostly very young for fetish circles (20's & 30's) and very mixed. There were some amazingly funny and saucy outfits, hello Darth Vader and Princess Leia, plus some obscenely hot ones, latex leggings furry tail butt plug girl you stole our heart. Everyone had made an effort, and it made the whole party feel that much more special.
We'll definitely be back at Kinky Salon, it struck a great balance between an East London arty dress up night, a fetish club and finally as swingers night where couples were welcome. Just crank up the volume a bit more and try not to play the Glee theme tune when I'm mood setting in my mind and battling with the brewers next time, eek!
The story of an OCD collector, who's gradually been shunned from society due to his habits of obsessing over collections of cocktail sticks, campaign badges, labels on melons etc. Hector, our protagonist, is driven to attempted suicide over his out of control hobby to collect things. On the brink of recovery he meets Brigitte, the love of his life and attempts to put all of his past behind him and settle down to a regular life. However watching her wash the windows in their flat one day, causes Hector to have the most erotic moment of his life, soon he's doing everything he can to turn the windows dirty again and re-live the sight of his wife's beautiful legs on the ladder as she washes them. One thing leads to another and before we know it, Hector is caught up in his need to collect moments of her teetering on ladders, as we read about how this affects the couple and their surrounding odd collection of friends and relatives.
I picked up this book after reading a staff choice card on it in Waterstones one day, that, and the fact that it's got a rather lovely pair of well illustrated legs on the cover sold it to me (foot fetishist, me? never!). I really really loved this book, it reads like a script for a Jean-Pierre Jeunet film. Hector's odd obsession over his wife can easily be transferred onto all the little fetishes that we keep amongst our relationships, and the way that they affect our lives. Although tragic at times, this is a love story, a story of understanding fetishes and learning to embrace and celebrate the oddities in each other. This isn't an erotic novel, per se, which is why I've not nominated it for our Erotic Book Club, however for anyone who's a bit sexually wonky, I would highly recommend this read. There are sex scenes, there are tales of nude dinner parties, and indecent exposure in it, however the true eroticism of the book comes from the relationship that Hector and Brigitte have, and how it develops. It's funny, it's a little kinky, it's poignant, it's a little saucy and most of all it's a great read.
Hello pervs and welcome to my new monthly post about recent my cinematic viewing pleasures and observations on what has made it through the realm of the censors. This month Fanny checked out:
I AM LOVE
Operatic is the word everyone is using to describe this film and it truly is: incredibly powerful music, stunningly shot in a way so few films attempt anymore, and wildly dramtic storyline of rich bitches in Milan. I always love how Tilda Swinton sexualises her androgyny and here she is middle aged beauty finally letting her hair down with her sons friend. The sex scenes are beautiful, her son is HOT and the bitchy polished grandma is hillarious. Don't see this film on an empty stomach though, it's an incredibly sensual film, including it's use of food.
WHIP IT
This list basically goes like this: hot tattooed girls, some in tight spandex outfits, beating each other up, on rollerskates, Ellen Page, Drew Barrymore, Eve, and Ari Graynor. There was basically no way I was ever NOT going to like this film. It's fun and flippant andf totally watchable. The underwater sex scene is a little weird - the actors look totally awarkward - but at least it's with a skinny indie boy so it's worth watching. But hello Wilson brother, Andrew, I haven't checked out before! Your family is seriously a bunch a stone foxes.
SAMSON & DELILAH
Ok, so this film is very hard for some people to watch and not one that will have you rushing back for a second viewing. But as an ex-pat I have to say that this is an incredibly important film, one that Australia needed to make and it was done brilliantly. Now that my serious rant is over, I have one main thing to say: Samson (Rowan McNamara) dancing with his top off. You see a bit of it in the trailer but sweet jesus it is a beautiful scene. It's cut with this incredible look of growing desire in Delilah's eyes, which actually struck me as something I don't see that much of in films (ie. a woman observing man and seeing the effect it has upon her).
STREET DANCE 3D (UK release: Friday 21 May 2010)
Predictable Friday night popcorn film it certainly is. If you've seen any other dance films in the last 10 years, it feels totally derivitive of them all. But hey, it does it well, and it's very British in a cheesy Hollywood way, so it does what it sets out to do. From the opening scene I thought I was about to see some 3D bedroom action (only a matter of time till someone does it) but sadly no. In fact, the whole film is very hands off and there aren't many hotties but they did very well at making Charlotte Rampling look like she's still go it going on! (I LOVE Charlotte Rampling)
DATE NIGHT
This film left Robin with a bit of a Tina Fey crush, which I don't mind at all because at least that takes the pressure off me having to look like Demi Moore in Charlie's Angels 2 when I pass 40. Anyway, the film is fun, fast moving and quite a sweet look at a modern married couple trying to keep their relationship fun, and the trouble it gets them into. It's really cast-up on the supporting roles, with Mark Wahlberg running around topless and the dishy James Franco playing it tough. No sex but hey, Tina and Steve kinda look like brother and sister anyway.
THE DISSAPEARANCE OF ALICE CREED (UK release: Friday 30 April 2010)
We all know Gemma Arterton is hot and she is going to be HUGE once Prince of Persia comes out next month, so it's nice to see her in this very small very British film just before she skyrockets away. This thriller is very tightly executed by hot new writer/director J Blakeson, so well indeed you barley notice that it doesn't move beyond one room and three characters for most of the film. Apart from totally scoring with Gemma, it is also wins with the addition of the very pretty Martin Compston (Red Road) who is very convincing as the charming and seductive kidnapper, who... oh god I want to spoil it for you but I won't. Definitely see this.
KICK-ASS
Written by our idea of a yummy-mummy, Jane Goldman, and starring this years ultimate MILF-lover, Aaron Johnson, Kick-Ass is pretty awesome, but the entire film is stolen by Hit Girl (Chloë Moretz), the best pre-pubescent female character since Mathilda in Léon. I actually really liked how unapologetic they made her and how she was dressed not in some overtly sexualised super-hero costume, but in exactly what I would have worn if I were a 12 year-old vigilante. Can the sequel just be about her, because the rest of the storyline paled in comparison. Apart from the sex-scene out the back of the comic book store, where Johnson and his girlfriend (Lyndsy Fonseca) have a spend a good minute of screen time fucking in the sunshine. Apparently there was another sex scene that hit the cutting room floor but might be worth buying the extended cut DVD for.
What Fanny is looking forward to:
SEX AND THE CITY 2 (UK release: Friday 28 May 2010)
No need to explain why but check out the red dress with the spikey shoulders that Samantha is rocking. Oh my, how Fanny needs this in her world!
IRON MAN 2 (UK release: Friday 30 April 2010)
Robert Downey Jnr plus Scarlett Johansson in a leather catsuit, yes please!
Edited by Alison Tyler and published by Cleis Press, 'Pleasure Bound' is 23 true tales of BDSM erotica and is available through The Book Depository and other leading literature websites.
Who say's a leopard can't change it's spots? Ok, so the majority of my fantasies revolve around powerful women in killer heels with smoldering scowling eyes. However the stories of submissive ladies getting off by being tied up, spanked and taken just past their limits in this collection certainly did it for me. This was a wonderful collection of short BDSM stories, which perfectly hit the mark. True it could have been a bit more balanced in terms of which gender was topping which (it felt a bit like the male submissive stories were stuck in at the end to make up numbers) and some stories were much better written than others. But never the less, this was a HOT collection, and I found myself jumping straight into the next story as soon as I'd finished one. Being based on true stories, and written from people who obviously get turned on by these things, it felt like a really warm and loving description of something which can to the outside seem quite scary. I'd probably tie it to the rafters in my ceiling and make it beg for 4 firm slaps out of 5.
Robin's bookshelf is stuffed with collections like these, so it is safe to say I've perused a few and have to admit I'm not usually compelled to read beyond a story or two. However, I found 'Pleasure Bound' quite enjoyable, and was happy to find more than a handfull of stories rather fun, including King of the Road, Yes Master, On The Mend, and Do I Look Like I'm Joking? The appeal for me was definitely in the fact that these were supposedly based on something each writer had experienced. I liked the confessional element it bought to each story - but then maybe that is the good Catholic school girl coming out in me. I also enjoyed how each story betrayed a more intimate look at BDSM relationships than such stories normally do, showing that these were experiences that often occurred in loving, supportive, safe environments. Some may find the variety in the stories pretty limited, as they were mainly about female submissives, but I definitely wasn't complaining. 'Pleasure Bound' gets 3 firm spanks out of 5 from me.
Agent Provocateur recently released the next instalment of their Mission to Earth ranges. The Winter collection brings together some delicious new ideas, some re-invention of older styles and even a couple of pairs of boots thrown into the mix. On a recent trip to one of their stores we got a chance to get up close and personal with the goodies and see if the garments lived up to the impressive advertising campaign...
Oh hello AP winter collection. Can I jut have all of you? No really, this is a very Fanny pleasing collection, if you'll pardon the pun. Yes, it's a lot more classic than Autumn's collection, but don't they do it well! Baroness, Black Swan, and Maitre D are delightfully chic, Meteorite and Ponytail are cute twist on vintage styling, but the hands down (legs spread) winner of the season, has to be Minnie! So sweet and well sculpted, I know of few breasts that wouldn't look adorable in this set. Oh yes, this gets a very gushing but truly delighted 5 out of 5 hip swishes from this little fan who can't wait for Christmas! *hint hint*
The last few collections from AP have left me happy but wanting more from the brand which pretty much set the bar for erotic and not trashy lingerie . This time around I was much more impressed with what they put out. My personal favourite was the Minnie set with it's striking red and white polka dot design. The Venus Fly Trap is a silver re-work of their classic play suits (one of which Miss Fanny owns) and have always been an absolute favourite of mine. As a final cherry on the cake, they've finally made available to the public the Thigh Boots which they've been tantalising the public with in their marketing and march through London (How exactly did I miss that???). My only concern is that their prices seem to be creeping up, especially in a time where most of us are feeling the pinch, I know they are a high end brand, but it would be nice not to have to wait for the sale every year. In summary I give their winter collection 4 nipple nibbles out of 5.
Originally published in 1988 by Alyson Books, Patrick Califia's "Macho Sluts" has been re-released in the UK this month by Arsenal Pulp Press. Brimming with sordid tales of gender bender BDSM, the book covers everything from Lesbians being topped by Gay male cops, through to a vampire fetish club blood letting love story, even a little vanilla sex is thrown in for good measure. Setting itself above most porn with very well written and paced stories, Pat takes us on a journey through a world of leather, pleasure, pain and a lot of hot fucking. Accompanying the stories is an essay berating censorship of erotica and timely advice (written as it was in the height of the Aids scare) on safe sex. A must have for anyone's naughty book cabinet.
Wow, what a collection, Jesus Christ, this is not a book you can read on the tube to work (although a friend of mine has tried). The stories depict hot unashamedly filthy deviant tales of sex, but always with a sense of love. The characters indulge in their passions and perversions with gusto, however they are always written with a sense of respect from Califia. My personal favourites included the story of the young girl being given a loving discipline session before being sent off to boarding school and the tale of the Cops mentioned above. In an almost Rolad Dahl way a lot of the stories have a surprising twist at the end which takes me back to the point that this is much better written and much more than just a collection of tales to beat off to. In summary this would get 5 hard canings, a wax drip and a good fisting out of five.
Oh, Saint Pat. How I adore thee. And how important this book has been, that reading it over 20 years after its original release, it still feels like there is space in the market / community / cosmos for such a title to be released. Amusingly, we previously hunted down an old edition prior to re-release to peruse, but it did result in me causing a series of 2nd hand book shop attendants on Charring Cross Rd to blush very hard upon enquiring if they possibly had the title. I love the introduction and how Califia firmly challenges the previously (and still somewhat) very guarded lesbian community to be more open and fluid with their fantasies and play times. And I think Pat was pretty successful as the not only are the subjects but the style a total win, making this a very entertaining read. I undoubtedly give it the full 5 Fanny fingers of fun.
Agent Provocateurs Autumn range of delicious lingerie recently came out with a bang, with Super hero and Rock Goddess styling it certainly made an impression. Titled "Mission To Earth" it came complete with a graphic novel to promote the range. Bright colours and a wide variety of styles including everything from playsuits to tshirt sets. See it online here.
I love AP, although it is very expensive, they do make lingerie which is much more daring in terms of style than almost anyone else. So it was with great anticipation that I saw they had a new collection coming out. Fanny and I had previously chatted about their worrying use of overly photoshopped very skinny models, however this time, although the styling and photoshop seems to have gone through the roof, at least a few more of the models are women. On first impressions my two personal favourites of the collection were the Bullet & Melody sets (pictured above). However I have to say that compared to the marketing images, the Bullet playsuit in real life looks a bit more Ann Summers than Agent Provocateur, and certainly not worth the £145 price tag (stockings & thong are extra). Melody in real life looks great, the only problem is that the best bits (the ruffle skirts) aren't actually available to buy. All in all the range is generally lovely, but a little to much style over substance. I'd give it two pinches on the buttocks and a teasing wink out of five.
I much prefer the eye-catching marketing of AP's new season compared to some of their recent attempts (did the big hair, awful photoshopping of Sirens give everyone else a massive soft-on?) but it really leaves me wondering what the actual pieces look like... the marketing shots and ones of individual items seem to vary greatly, so I'd be heading instore before I part with my precious Pussy Pounds. A lady wants to have a little confidence in what she is buying. While much of it looks rather exciting, some of the more creative and risqué pieces sadly seem kinda cheap (hello, Hornette!), but maybe that's the look they are going for. The classicist in me l.o.v.e.s the look of Pantheria set and the Kameelion skirt but little else is melting my butter. Perhaps, gone are the days when I would have gladly splashed out on an entire AP range if I had the chance??? I give Mission To Earth two chipped red fingernails out of five.
Last night was the headline event of 2009's London Fetish Weekend, The London Fetish Ball hosted by Torture Garden at Mass in Brixton. Across 4 rooms over 2 floors, there was a variety of dj's and performances, play areas and dance floors, with a very dressed up crowd, as enforced by TG organisers. Running from 10pm till 6am, tickets ranged from £23 to £30 and was attended by about 1,000 fetishists and pleasure-seekers from around the globe.
Summer has been a bit quiet at the TG parties, so it was delightful to be at a packed-out party once more! Last night was a pleasure to attend, with Scottee dj's set of trashy hits setting my well-heeled feet on fire and Esme's delightful 'Meat' performance putting a flutter in my heart. The venue was, as usual, a suitable setting for a party of such size and style, and was thankfully without any of the hitches that apparently spoilt May's Birthday Ball earlier this year, (such as ridiculous drink queues - not that we attended because of the SEone venues distasteful insistence on scanning all attendees ID details into a database). Once again, Allen & the TG team did a marvellous job at hosting one of the world's top fetish parties and ensured we staggered home at dawn, rubbing each others sore toes and giggling about the evenings adventures. Last night gets four lipstick kisses out of five from this very hungover latex lover.
I'd been looking for an excuse to slip into my new shiny nun's habit for a while, so the TG Fetish Ball seemed the perfect opportunity. With Everything from Australian Disco Sailors on the dancefloor to Rubber dominatrixes kicking guys in the balls in the dungeon, this really was a party not to be missed. The music was incredibly danceable and the venue perfect. My one gripe is the 'Fashion Shows' that are often put on as performances, in comparison to some of the actual performers they pale in comparison. The drinks are a little pricey (£6 Spirit & Mixer) but considering the atmosphere and the fact most people are struggling to balance in ridiculous heels, perhaps a hindrance to drinking too much is a great idea. For a club where many people spend far too much time and money perfecting their look before they dare enter, TG remains one of the friendliest and welcoming London club's I've been to. Robin gives this Four very hard spanks on the bottom (sorry about those Fanny).
AA have released a new pair of tights - pretty basic in every way except that they have cut the ass out of them! Creating a thong effect, these sheer lovelies are a rather sexy and suggestive twist to traditional tights. At £26 / $28 a pop, they are available in AA stores and online.
To be fair, I'm not a great fan of tights, in fact generally I abhor them. The first view I caught of these ones however was as my blindfold was removed 3 inches from Fanny's bottom. "They are a bit peculiar" she said, "but keep an open mind". At first I wasn't sure what was going on, she was plainly wearing a thong and a pair of stockings, then as my eyes focussed I began to twig. Certainly they beat any other pair of tights I've seen in my life, top marks for novelty and they do frame a bottom quite deliciously. However I have to say, as with all tights, they do have one great downfall (and I'm not talking about an unflattering gusset), you still have to take them off to actually have sex. I'd give them 2 cheeky winks out of 5 with a bonus point for effort.
I'm a big fan of anything that highlights ones ass, even if they are hidden. And thankfully, AA chose a model for these with a fuller bottom (than most fashion models) which highlights how delightful these tights can be when one is presenting a rear view. They are quite sheer, so you wouldn't really be wearing them for warmth mid-winter anyway, so they aren't really designed for practical purposes, and at such a price, if you are anything like me (and a pair of tights only last one or two wears before you fall drunkenly in bushes or snag them on your bicycle) then then are only really designed to be worn in the bedroom. Which isn't anything to complain about I think. These tights get 3 hard spanks out of 5 from me! xxx
